A Look in the Mirror

One of the pleasures of being Catholic is the wonderful array of prayers available.  Yes, as a Catholic, a person can still say their own prayers.  We're encouraged to do so.  But, we also have a vast treasury of prayers handed down through the history of the Church.

When I was a Protestant I fell for the lie that Catholics can only pray those prayers the Church approves of.   Well, during Mass, yes, we have corporate prayers that the Church throughout the world is also saying.  That is a part of the unity we have.

I find it beautiful to know the prayers and scripture I'll be hearing and saying during Mass this morning are the same prayers my Catholic friends will also be hearing in their churches throughout the country.

Much of my time in prayer is divided between my individual prayer and prayers from the history of the Church.  Some of these old prayers I have memorized after reading them many times.  Some I hope to have memorized soon because they are very beautiful and meaningful.  I have known the Lord's Prayer since I was a kid.  I have recently come to know more about it and it's more wonderful now.

In my former Protestant mindset I was programmed to think these prayers that so many Catholics have memorized are nothing more than "vain repetitions" and are condemned in the Bible.  Catholics agree we are not to pray with vain repetitions.  That's why when we pray these prayers over & over we are to make them sincere and from the heart.

Jesus did not condemn repetitious prayer.  Even Jesus prayed repetitious prayers (see Matthew 26:44).  He condemned vain prayer.  You can pray the most unique, original prayer vainly; that's a no-no.   You can pray the Lord's Prayer a thousand times sincerely; that's a good thing.

What have I found in praying some of these old prayers over & over while trying to focus on the words and set them in my heart?   There's too much to say.  They're like spiritual food that give me hope, strength, and courage throughout the day.   They also awaken my soul to truths that I just did not get the first time...or the 100th.

One prayer I've prayed many, many times is the Fatima Prayer.  I often pray it as much as five times in one day.  It's a short simple prayer.

Oh my Jesus, forgive us our sins.  Save us from the fires of Hell.  Lead all souls to heaven, especially those in most need of Thy mercy.  Amen.

That's it.  Seems simple & sweet.  Yet, it's deceptively powerful.

So here I was one day driving to work.  I said this prayer like I have hundreds of time before.  I prayed it from the heart like I always try to do, but this time something was very different.

The part that says "especially those in most need of They mercy" used to mean to me those wayward souls suffering from addictions, a life of sin, and those doing their best to run from God.  Well, it still does mean that, but I added one more person.

Me.

I - even though I now try to live a godly life - am still in most need of Thy mercy.

I cannot get to Heaven on my own.  I am in MOST NEED of Jesus' mercy every single moment of my life.  Through God's mercy will I get to heaven.  Through God's mercy do my charitable acts mean anything.  Through God's mercy I am saved from his justifiable wrath upon the wicked things I've done.

Tears filled my eyes.  I almost had to pull to the side of the highway.  I had looked in a spiritual mirror and saw that I am one of those in most need of his mercy.

And, so are all of my Christian friends who struggle and are torn between the ways of the world and the ways of Heaven.

And, so are all of my non-Christian friends.

We all are in most need of his mercy.

I thank God for these wonderful prayers that we can recite from memory.  If we pray them a thousand times from the heart, these prayers help us to love God and others more & more every day.

 

Saturday Afternoon

My son being lazy with me.

Gimme Three Steps

Background Check

My road to full communion with the Catholic Church was long and slow.  For most of the journey I had no idea I was even on that road.  The last leg of the trip was quick, sure, and put chills down my spine.

I revealed the experience to much of the world on an earlier post, Mark's Roman Road.

Here's the condensed version:

• I was raised in a Christian home.  My father was a pastor.  I attended a Christian college and an evangelical seminary.
• I became a Christian before I left grade school.  I never denounced my faith as I grew older, but I wasn't good at showing it either.
• I regularly attended many different Protestant denominations through the years:  Church of God (Anderson, IN), Church of God (Cleveland, TN), Church of Christ, American Baptist, Southern Baptist, Presbyterian (PCA), several different "Bible Churches," and churches that seemed like they hide their affiliation (if they even had one):  You know, the "________ Community Church."
• I spent much of my adult life looking for the Church that was the closest to what Jesus had in mind when He taught his disciples.  I was not comfortable with the notion of we agree on the essentials mentality.  There had to be church of best fit (Statistic joke there), but they all were missing something.
• My wife & I attended a nice, little Catholic parish one Saturday night in August 2014 and knew there was something very special about it.  A few weeks later we started attending their adult Christian education (RCIA) to find out more.  I was still skeptical at first, but then my world view was rocked.
• Our son was born in December and all three of us came into full communion with the Catholic Church during the Easter vigil in April 2015.

We're Right; You're Wrong

Protestants like to criticize the Roman Catholic Church about their claim of being the Church that Jesus founded with Peter being the first Pope.  That's what makes it so easy for Protestants (and I was one of them) to jump from denomination to denomination looking for the church that best fits their personal view of what the Bible teaches.  Anything-But-Catholic Christians look for the church that best fits their idea of the true church.  Albeit some people just look for a church that plays their kind of music, allows their kind of dress, habits, etc, or has a preacher that has the look & sound that they approve of. 

A big problem of Protestantism followed me wherever I went;  each denomination thought they had it correct.  Each thought they were the best one.  They all thought that if they weren't the true church that Jesus established on this earth, then they were the best one out of the bunch.

Now, you'll probably never hear a spokesperson for any denomination come right out and say "we're the church most in line with Jesus' teaching."  You'll probably never see it printed in their literature, but it's certainly implied.

Obviously, if any denomination truly thought they did NOT have it down the best, wouldn't they change?   Certainly they'd either change their doctrinal statement or assimilate into another denomination (that they thought was better).  If they admitted to not teaching something that Jesus taught or being inferior to another denomination, then why in the world would you be a part of that church!

I have heard many statements such as:  "We'll, I may be wrong in understanding what Jesus (or any other Biblical author) is saying here, but this is how I believe it to mean.  I feel the Holy Spirit will correct me someday if I'm wrong.  So, until then, this is what I believe _______ in the Bible to mean."   Many times I've said it myself.

So, whether they admit it or not, each protestant denomination thinks they're either the church Jesus established on this earth or the closest thing to it.

I guess it's logically possible for Church X to be honest and claim that Church Y is the better church, but then why would you want to join Church X?   Maybe you prefer their style of music or the cool preacher who dresses in jeans and his (or her) shirt untucked.

And Then There Were Six

In the past, I had attended Catholic Mass a few times with friends who invited me.  I went out of respect for my friends ... and to try to find something by which to attack the Catholic Church.  The priests words seemed true, Biblical, and logically sound.   I was amazed at how much prayer and Scripture reading was done in Mass.  Things were a bit weird to me with all the standing, sitting, and kneeling.  In short, it was just not my cup of tea.  I preferred the Evangelical/Baptist Churches that I attended the most.  Catholicism was not for me, I decided.

Saints and Sola Fide

Summersville, WV, the small town we were living in a few years ago, does not get many radio stations.  One station that comes in clearly is the local Catholic station.  I found myself listening to Catholic Answer Live one night.  I was quite shocked to find out that the gentlemen speaking - with whom I had agreed with everything I heard them say that night - were CATHOLICS!   Those Catholic guys sounded like well-read Christians that I had listened to at apologetics conferences and in books I've read.  I began to listen to the show on a regular basis.  They didn't turn me into a Catholic, but they did help me understand two of the last big six problems that I had with Catholicism:  asking Saints to pray for us (just like I'd ask friends at church or on FaceBook to pray for me), and the Protestant dogma of sola fide.

Sola fide is Latin for "faith alone."  It sounds so good to one's ears to say, "I believe it in my heart. I am saved by faith alone.  I have faith in Jesus and that's all I need."  But, that's not what the Bible says.  The bad news for Protestants is that the only place in the Bible (remember, they believe only in what can be found in the Bible - sola scriptura - more on this later) where "faith alone" is mentioned is James 2:24.  Here we read the Holy Spirit inspire the human author to tells us that "a man is justified by works and not by faith alone."  

If you still believe in sola fide, try to ignore the Bible's teaching in James 2:26, Galatians 5:6, 1 Corithians 13:2 (love is an act and "acts" are works, people), John 14:15, .... and pretty much throughout the whole Bible you see God telling us to act a certain way and do certain things.  God doesn't say, "Oh, you got faith in me?  Well, then, that's good enough!  Keep on doing whatever you want."

I previously blogged about the Saints here.  I previously touched on sola fide here.

So, my Protestant wall of protection from Catholicism started to have some structural damage.  Well, at least I still had sola scriptura to keep me safe from those pesky Catholics.

Farewell Sola Scriptura

Way back in the summer of 2014 I was still unpacking boxes from our move to Charleston, WV from Summersville.  I started a new job in March and my wife & I were expecting our first baby sometime in December.  A new job, a new apartment in the city, a baby on the way, and we were trying to find a new "home church," - it was kind of overwhelming for a guy who had spent the first forty-nine years of his life as a bachelor.  I knew I wasn't prepared for all that was about to come, so I prayed.

I prayed hard.  I prayed alone.  I prayed with my wife.

It didn't take long to realize that one prayer that frequently - if several times a day can be considered frequent - came from my heart was, "Lord, draw me closer to you.  Conform me to your will.  Make me the man you want me to be."

I was reading my Bible and praying.  Nothing seemed to be happening.  I felt like I was at a spiritual red light, waiting a long time for it to turn green.

In August my wife & I began talking about the Catholic Church.  We were both disgusted with the way a Protestant pastor had recently conducted communion in a church service and I made the comment, "you'd never see that done in a Catholic Church."

My wife was curious and started asking questions. She mentioned many of the false, Protestant ideas about Catholic beliefs (many that I also held at one time or another) and I found myself being somewhat of a Catholic apologist.  I wasn't trying to make her Catholic, but I knew much of what Protestants think they know about Catholicism is based on lies.  I Googled the location of nearby Catholic parishes.  There was one less than a mile away.

Pregnant women have a strange appetite.  I was making a run to Burger King in Kanawha City (at her request) and took a small detour to drive by St Anges Catholic Church (unbeknownst to her).  There was something about the outside of the building that made me want to see the inside of it too.

I told my wife about how I went by the church.  "YOU DID? Why?" she asked.  I told her they have a Saturday evening service and soon we attended our first Mass together.  We were scared beforehand.  We were blessed afterwards.  We stood & sat at all the wrong times.  I don't think either of us knelt at any time.  We didn't bless ourselves with holy water from the font.  We just sat in the back row and observed.

The light turned green and I proceeded into the intersection with caution.

"Draw me closer to You, dear Lord," was still my constant prayer.   "At any cost."

Then I began to notice one of my former seminary classmates saying some things on FaceBook and on his website that sounded pretty, darn Catholic.  I asked him about it and he said that he had come into full communion with the Church that Easter.  The topic of sola scriptura came up soon and he directed me to a good article.  I read it and began to feel my Protestant wall begin to crumble.

That article alone did not convince me that sola scriptura is wrong.  I read many other Catholic articles.  I knew the typical Protestant arguments.  I was tested on them in seminary.  I read the Protestant arguments for sola scriptura for years.  "If a statement about faith is not in the Bible, then why should I believe it?" was my typical Protestant response.  The trouble with that is that nowhere in the Bible does it say we're to believe only matters of faith that are mentioned in the Bible.  The Bible doesn't teach sola scriptura!  I weighed all the evidence and was smacked right in the face: Sola scriptura is a man-made dogma.

Two down.  Three to go.

Gimme Three Steps

So here I was drawn to the Catholic Church.  I'd lie awake at night sometimes thinking about it.  I couldn't wait to come home and kiss my wife and for us to start reading about Catholicism again.  She would often direct me to YouTube videos about Catholicism that she had watched earlier that day. Her interest in the Church was growing, too.  I kept praying for God to draw me closer to Him.  To help me - to help us - see the Truth.

You've got to understand that because of my Protestant upbringing and education, even remotely considering becoming a Catholic was deathly scary.  Yet, every Sunday we'd attend Mass and couldn't help but think, "this seems so right on so many levels."  But, there were three big issues that still kept me thinking heavily about going back to some flavor of Protestantism:

1. Is Christ's true Church really founded on Peter?  If so, then Catholicism (or maybe Eastern Orthodoxy) is true and all Protestant churches are going down a dangerous path.
2. Transubstantiation?  If that is false, then the Catholic Church is crazy, and I want no part of that no matter how beautiful the services are.
3. What about Mary's role in the Church?  Have Catholics gone too far, or have Protestants not gone far enough?

  

One thing every Protestant church I attended had in common was attacking Catholics on the three questions I had left.   Now remember at the beginning of this article I wrote about how Protestants look (whether they'll admit or not) for a church that best fits their idea & beliefs of Christianity.  I'd leave a church whenever I heard the pastor repeatedly preach things that I thought were in error.  I'd stay at a church as long as the pastor didn't get too heretical too often.  I was - like many - basing the church I attended on what I felt the Bible told me was the truth.

Wouldn't God want it the other way around?  Wouldn't you think the Church Jesus founded would teach Christians what to believe and that we should stay with that Church even if it taught something that ruffled our feathers a bit?

Sometimes the truth isn't easy to accept at first, but that doesn't make it any less true.